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A Senior comes to
Paradise
Offline messages regarding these posts do
compel some replies. There is considerable interest in the after
effect of my romance with Flo. Actually, I asked her to write her
take on the events which I had planned to submit unedited. I have
not done so because she wrote an intensely personal message that the
moderators would find unacceptable because it is directed to one
person- ME. Just a clue: her message began a la Elizabeth Barrett
Browning, “Why do I love thee I love you because of what you are…”
and so on. If you want to know the rest, an offline request will get
you the rest. We talk twice a day on average.
Then there was an interesting question about
Cee, my head caregiver companion who quit. She too, has kept in
touch. Cee is 31 years old is married to a merchant seaman who is
currently aboard ship. His contract is for seven months. They are
saving to build a houses on land that they own close to the beach.
On one journey his ship put into Manila and Cee was able to visit
him aboard.
She is looking for work. Her sister Bee
married to an American had orchestrated our relationship. In fact,
when I agreed to come to Iloilo, Bee called Cee in Hong Kong where
she was working and persuaded her to get back to Iloilo. So when Cee
quit, Later Cee told me that Bee was very upset with her. Bee keeps
her attention on the bottom line. I was a cottage industry for the
family. Cee threw away this industry when she quit. After she quit I
think she had second thoughts. The question in my mind is what was
the real reason that she quit? Cee was overpayed. She had to know
this because when I gave Cher the same amount, Cee was incensed !!
The fact that Cher is a graduate nurse, a professional, made no
difference to Cee. She felt I should not have been paying her so
much money although she never complained about her salary which was
exactly the same. Was she a good caregiver? Yes without question.
She had raw talent as an administrative assistant but unlike Cher
she was afraid of anything electrical and blood terrified her. Other
than that she took the “absent” out of absent-minded that
characterizes yours truly. She could find things I misplaced even
obscure (to her) manuals. I value that. I was fond of her and I
think the feeling was mutual. On my birthday, June 6tth,
she, her mother, who is always with her and several little children
of the family brought me a delicious cake. I ate a small piece. Why
was I so suspicious of her. Well there was an incident which does
not prove guilt but made me wonder. At one point when Cee, Bo and I
were at KFC, Bo asked Cee speaking Ilongo to get him 35,000 p to buy
a motorcycle. Cee translated for me and told me that she had
refused. A few weeks later when I was concerned about mysteriously
dwindling balances in one account, I told Cee I wanted to go to that
bank to check on the account. At that moment, in a Avery casual
voice, Cee said that the week before she had won 50,000 pesos at
bingo and had bought a motorcycle for her brother. The timing made
my antennae shoot up. A few days later when her mother and I were
alone at a birthday party, mother, whose English is not too good,
told me that Cee had won 70,000 pesos at bingo and had given it all
to her! A few days later, sister Bee in the states called to say
“Hi” and casually mentioned that Cee had won money at Bingo and
bought a motorcycle for her father. I never questioned Cee about any
of this or even hinted that I was suspicious but she volunteered
that she knew I did not trust her. So when she quit ostensibly in
protest about my hiring Cher, I suspected that she was afraid some
of her activities would be uncovered. There was no smoking gun but I
sure smelled smoke. Money in the account had dwindled but I never
found out why or even if it was above and beyond the doctors and
hospital expenses. I could not prove a thing so I have to say that
Cee was innocent because not proven guilty. She and Bo started to
pressure me to move because my rent was too high. Indeed it was and
is at 25,000 pesos per month but that is another story. Cee made it
clear that she did not like being on this compound. Remember, my
landlady takes a personal interest in my welfare and I discovered
after Cee left that the compound where everything is known about
everyone, was concerned about Cee. She had a daily habit of
disappearing in the afternoon for several hours, coming back late at
night before I would go to bed. The compound, including landlady was
very critical of this behavior. Cee and Bo actually identified a
house which they said belonged to an aunt. It was close to Cee’
mother’s house and not associated with a compound. When asked how
much Cee said it would be 20,000 per month. I objected that this was
not a great saving whereupon Cee said that after three months it
would be reduced to 15,000. They took me to see the house which was
being refurbished. There was no AC, no fridge, no stove. The young
man there who was representing his dad in the states said the tenant
would have to supply. When I asked the rent he said 15,000.
Still, Cee and Bo persisted. They wanted me to
make the deal right away even suggesting that my son would approve.
Finally, I flat out said No. I was not going to move. I recognized
an attempt to control and a possible mistaken assumption that a
weakened physical condition translated into weakened mental and
emotional condition thus making me susceptible to control. I had to
put a stop to that. I had been guilty of misleading them with my
laid back attitude.
Cee is not proven guilty but she is a person
of interest.
Cher and Derek are a different story. They
have two of
My cards with the pin numbers but we do
reviews of withdrawals and cash on hand. Derek has a business degree
so he does an accounting not only to me but to my son in the States.
I can’t say enough about them. They prove all of the positive
comments about nurturing care in the Philippines. I have been warned
about overpayment and indeed I thought that I was over paying Cher.
Considering her expanded value to me I did not care. But then I
found out that actually I am underpaying her. Cher has classmates
who are doing private nursing at a hospital and receiving
32,000pesos per month. Cher gets 20,000. My conscience has been
salved if my nerves are not. Her family, like so many, needs money.
I cannot afford to lose her. I would be willing to over pay her, but
don’t tell her.
There has been considerable comment about the
romance and one person said that receiving 500 responses to my
dating post was not surprising. He at one time in the past had
received 1500!! But then was he 84???
One advantage to Cher and Derek is they are
always getting visitors usually beautiful classmates and friends.
They never fail to bring them to meet me. Then I take their pictures
which I print on the spot. They pose with me up close and personal
for a photo. I now have a great collection which would make the most
depraved lothario jealous. Why do I think to “The Picture of Dorian
Gray”? My great SLR camera is
My weapon of mass seduction !
Did I mention that Cher is beautiful as well
as brilliant? What a combination. This is a Third World Country with
First World People. I am lucky and privileged to be here.
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