Author Topic: Showing Off  (Read 1333 times)

Offline FastWalk

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Showing Off
« on: May 16, 2017, 01:11:41 AM »
I found this last year that I had a problem (in Philippines),  maybe because of not showing off (enough).  Not telling all the details cause still fixing it.  Problem will be solved and I think I will end up better off on all categories.   Now your scratching your head,  and thinking what that heck....

The question/topic is what differences compared to other places in the world if any do you see in the need to show off your position(s) or situations so that others and organization give you fair treatment in the phills?  We found it can be a problem to be too quiet.. ;)

Offline Art, just a re(tired) Fil-Am

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Re: Showing Off
« Reply #1 on: May 16, 2017, 03:56:40 AM »
Don't show off that you're a person or family of wealth,
you could be targeted to be robbed and or killed, unless
you can afford a few 24/7 armed security body guards.   
"Life is what we all make it to be"!
"It's always a matter of money"!
"Do on to others as they would do on to You, but do it first"!
"Different strokes for different folks"!
"Que Sera Sera"!

Offline FastWalk

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Re: Showing Off
« Reply #2 on: May 16, 2017, 06:03:54 AM »
Don't show off that you're a person or family of wealth,
you could be targeted to be robbed and or killed, unless
you can afford a few 24/7 armed security body guards.

Art,  That is of course solid advice !! 

We usually are quiet for that reason and also its just our way.   It resulted in other foreigners trying to take advantage,  when we are way.  ppl we did not know.  It was finally explained to me that the local ppl viewed the others as more important..., cause they show off much :(


Offline trevor

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Re: Showing Off
« Reply #3 on: May 18, 2017, 11:09:42 AM »
Showing off is a way of life here, by the locals. As a foreigner i try to be invisible and keep as low a profile as i can. Well living in the province and in a small town that is not too possible as everyone knows everyone else.
So i just often smile and give a nod, show respect and not be a loud mouth. If something does not pleases me i let the wife deal with it.
So far no problem.
Never look down on anyone and always extend a helping hand. Tomorrow the role may be reverse.
Life is what you make it. Nothing to do with luck.

Offline Art, just a re(tired) Fil-Am

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Re: Showing Off
« Reply #4 on: May 18, 2017, 07:21:59 PM »
Showing off is a way of life here, by the locals. As a foreigner i try to be invisible and keep as low a profile as i can. Well living in the province and in a small town that is not too possible as everyone knows everyone else.
So i just often smile and give a nod, show respect and not be a loud mouth. If something does not pleases me I let the wife deal with it.
So far no problem.
That's a good attitude to have. A few years ago, I knew of a guy from Norway and he was the obnoxious and loud mouth type to most Filipinos he had dealings with.
One day there came a knocking at his front door. His maid opened the door and 3 masked intruders made it into the home. They subdued the foreigner and shot him once point blank to his forehead and the intruders left immediately. The maid and his girlfriend was left unharmed and nothing was taken from the home.
The incident never made the local news or social media. 
 
"Life is what we all make it to be"!
"It's always a matter of money"!
"Do on to others as they would do on to You, but do it first"!
"Different strokes for different folks"!
"Que Sera Sera"!

Offline Gray Wolf

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Re: Showing Off
« Reply #5 on: May 19, 2017, 12:29:57 AM »
Art,  That is of course solid advice !! 

We usually are quiet for that reason and also its just our way.   It resulted in other foreigners trying to take advantage,  when we are way.  ppl we did not know.  It was finally explained to me that the local ppl viewed the others as more important..., cause they show off much :(

I agree with Art and others that it's best to keep a relatively low profile to prevent becoming a target of scammers, beggars, thieves, etc. Do you want/need to be viewed as "important"? In which part of the PH do you live?
Louisville, KY USA

Offline FastWalk

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Re: Showing Off
« Reply #6 on: May 19, 2017, 09:45:38 AM »
Showing off is a way of life here, by the locals. As a foreigner i try to be invisible and keep as low a profile as i can. Well living in the province and in a small town that is not too possible as everyone knows everyone else.
So i just often smile and give a nod, show respect and not be a loud mouth. If something does not pleases me i let the wife deal with it.
So far no problem.

ya,  I agree completely.   I ended up having wife who asked our Ninong to deal w/ it.  I was very amazed at how much help we got,  I had no idea how much support and and every level,  its hard to explain.  I as amazed.  We usually never ask help,  it was amazing to see how many and how much showed so very fast.

I sort of got the expected response from forum members,  to not look for trouble.   I know that one,  I was just interested if its an all the time problem I should expect from life in Phills,  or if it just occasionally goes that way.  I was probably asking a dumb question,  cause I already know the answer.  it was just a topic.  :)
   

Offline FastWalk

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Re: Showing Off
« Reply #7 on: May 19, 2017, 09:53:32 AM »
I agree with Art and others that it's best to keep a relatively low profile to prevent becoming a target of scammers, beggars, thieves, etc. Do you want/need to be viewed as "important"? In which part of the PH do you live?

We are in Leyte when in the Phills. 

Honestly sometimes it is nice to be viewed as important.  But usually it is a hassle.   This was the first time I can recall in my life of having officials go against me due to perceived importance.  We usually dress and look like farmers and ride public transportation often,  give kids candy,  few drinks,   roast pigs,  etc...   Often friends of family will ask the family why we don't do things in a more flashy way,  we usually find that question funny.   

Offline hitekcountry

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Re: Showing Off
« Reply #8 on: May 19, 2017, 11:31:04 AM »
This was the first time I can recall in my life of having officials go against me due to perceived importance. 

In dealing with officials I think it has more to do with their attitude toward others then it has to do with you. Iíve come across some that appeared to have a dislike for foreigners and they acted like jerks and then Iíve come across others that treat me like a VIP.

Offline JD

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Re: Showing Off
« Reply #9 on: May 19, 2017, 04:24:21 PM »
We're not flashy people at all. I'm the type that won't even buy/wear logo clothing unless it can't be helped. My wife Menchu is the same, with the exception of enjoying a knockoff handbag now and then. We try to purchase and use/wear middling items that carry the most value for the cost. Of course, for many Filipinos, that is already flashy.

Anything legal or business-wise, Menchu handles for us here as I did for us in the US. My hearing is so bad now that I can't understand even English spoken many times so it's lucky for me that my wife is smart and capable. We did everything above-board on our block wall/house build. She dealt with city officials and offices (sometimes with me along as token Kano). We've had to go to a lawyer and threaten one person, a long-time friend of Menchu's, who stole money from us once and was using a copy of my wife's ID. That person did pay us back in full and disappeared from the area without a lawsuit.

We stay very much under the radar and cultivate good relations with our neighbors. Each gets a smile and a wave and some conversation purposely (and because we enjoy them) whenever possible. At Christmas, they all receive something with our warm holiday wishes. They have all helped us a time or two and we have helped them whenever we can.

We use taxis and tricycles to get around, so there's no flashy car in our carport. Everyone who works for us, professional or not, gets fed and watered while they're here and paid the asking price or the going rate. We don't argue with anyone. I try very hard to be known only as "that nice Amerikano".

Offline piozam13

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Re: Showing Off
« Reply #10 on: May 20, 2017, 04:44:09 AM »
there are communities in the country where  it is not difficult to blend in - foreigners and locals with  the same socio eco background.  it is more difficult to stand out.  you can be yourself.  some locals have more than you do.  it is easier to find friends and a sense of belonging.  that is why location of where to live is very  important. or what is important to you?

Offline JD

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Re: Showing Off
« Reply #11 on: May 20, 2017, 10:17:31 AM »
some locals have more than you do.

True dat. There's a house just down the main road from us that's a palace compared to ours. Giant lot, high steel bar fence, two floors and a very large footprint. I'm pretty sure it's not owned by a foreigner but we've no idea who lives there.

Offline Art, just a re(tired) Fil-Am

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Re: Showing Off
« Reply #12 on: May 20, 2017, 12:29:10 PM »
True dat. There's a house just down the main road from us that's a palace compared to ours. Giant lot, high steel bar fence, two floors and a very large footprint. I'm pretty sure it's not owned by a foreigner but wee've no idea who lives there.
There's an old rich lady that lives in our subdivision, her 1st floor has an air conditioned swimming pool. Another, just one corner lot was built as a garage only to park their 5 luxury vehicles.
"Life is what we all make it to be"!
"It's always a matter of money"!
"Do on to others as they would do on to You, but do it first"!
"Different strokes for different folks"!
"Que Sera Sera"!

Offline FastWalk

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Re: Showing Off
« Reply #13 on: May 20, 2017, 01:12:38 PM »
there are communities in the country where  it is not difficult to blend in - foreigners and locals with  the same socio eco background.  it is more difficult to stand out.  you can be yourself.  some locals have more than you do.  it is easier to find friends and a sense of belonging.  that is why location of where to live is very  important. or what is important to you?
I think some or many locals have MUCH more than we do.  Many Chinese  or Phil/Chinese.  Even just in our clan we are not even close to the top.  Some have to give hectors and hectors of land to the Church cause its the law to divest the land.  It is so far above us that can not even imagine.

I would not live any place but around our family.  Yes we have to give some to some,  but what the heck...  I guess I have about 25 or 30 years left,  hope it will be fun.

Offline FastWalk

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Re: Showing Off
« Reply #14 on: May 20, 2017, 09:53:16 PM »
We're not flashy people at all. I'm the type that won't even buy/wear logo clothing unless it can't be helped. My wife Menchu is the same, with the exception of enjoying a knockoff handbag now and then. We try to purchase and use/wear middling items that carry the most value for the cost. Of course, for many Filipinos, that is already flashy.

Anything legal or business-wise, Menchu handles for us here as I did for us in the US. My hearing is so bad now that I can't understand even English spoken many times so it's lucky for me that my wife is smart and capable. We did everything above-board on our block wall/house build. She dealt with city officials and offices (sometimes with me along as token Kano). We've had to go to a lawyer and threaten one person, a long-time friend of Menchu's, who stole money from us once and was using a copy of my wife's ID. That person did pay us back in full and disappeared from the area without a lawsuit.

We stay very much under the radar and cultivate good relations with our neighbors. Each gets a smile and a wave and some conversation purposely (and because we enjoy them) whenever possible. At Christmas, they all receive something with our warm holiday wishes. They have all helped us a time or two and we have helped them whenever we can.

We use taxis and tricycles to get around, so there's no flashy car in our carport. Everyone who works for us, professional or not, gets fed and watered while they're here and paid the asking price or the going rate. We don't argue with anyone. I try very hard to be known only as "that nice Amerikano".

now that is a great style.  at least from my viewpoint.

 


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