Author Topic: What have we(Filipinas) become....  (Read 9778 times)

Offline Lei

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What have we(Filipinas) become....
« on: August 03, 2015, 08:16:06 AM »
I felt anguish on a recent issue and I thought I share.

Two months ago, a 70 year old retired American guy came to rent a unit in the property. He used to be married to a Filipina when he came to retire initially here a few years ago, brought her back to the US and later divorced him. That is his story and he sounded bitter and boy he is a talker. He came on a PRA visa and is actively looking for a partner/companion. Ok, don't point a finger at me, I am not interested nor he does lol. I tried not to get involved with his affairs as he likes to share what's going on on his daily life and so I made it a point to deal with my brother and his wife for any concern. So he did talked a lot to them as they help him clean his place and do his laundry.

A couple of weeks ago, he had been trolling the internet dating sites and chat sites. And suddenly, he had been sending money to western union to bring these women he met online to his place, according to my brother. One stayed for 1 day, 2 days etc. and I have to step in and talked  to him. He thinks, it is not my business, perhaps so, but I told him he is on a month to month lease and if I don't agree with what's going on in my property, I have the right to ask him to leave. He seem to get along with the last gal and enthusiastic about her, a 27 year old woman from Laguna. But...she has a child from being a rape victim.

Yesterday, the gal from laguna left and she said she is coming back and the American guy left today to Angeles City for a 2 weeks stay. Over dinner last night, my sister in law said, he is meeting 30-50 women in his hotel, by the pool, and screen them one by one. He got a checklist. I was shocked! Hence, this dilemma. What has become of us Filipinas. We have become so cheap and has lost morals. Of course, there's an exception. Was it due to so much poverty and a glimmer of hope to go abroad and have a better life? Blame the politicians for being insensitive to the plight of the people they ought to serve by being corrupt to the bone and not doing their job of creating jobs and curtailing the over population? What about the ethics of these foreign guys who come to the country and exploit our women. How many other foreign guys come to the country doing similar to what this guy is doing? Ok ok, I have heard women scammers as well to be fair. My other concern is the spread of HIV and AIDS in the country. Recent news indicate about 500 new cases of the deadly virus added to the statistics every month. More young people who have no idea of the virus and it's transmission are getting infected. Now go figure. The INCUBATION period of the virus is up to TEN YEARS and that means one can be infected without showing symptoms and spread the virus to others. Get tested? Please bear in mind that the WINDOW period after one is infected can take ....2 weeks - 6 months...for the body to start making HIV antibodies....and that means one can have NEGATIVE test, even tho infected and spread the disease.

I know there's a lot of decent, level headed expats/foreign guys out there who have found the love of their life and have made the country their permanent home or have brought their ladies back to their home country. Perhaps you can share your experiences/ideas for others to learn from, on how to meet women without playing Russian roulette, with more respect or without exploiting our vulnerable women. Thank you.


Offline BudM

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Re: What have we(Filipinas) become....
« Reply #1 on: August 03, 2015, 10:17:55 AM »
Are you kidding me?  I am not going to judge him and say he is right or wrong, moral or not but I can tell you that he is so far in the opposite direction to most of us that he or anyone like him will not listen to anything any of us say.  They think about it 10 seconds and then say, "patooey".

By the way, it appears you have been living a fairly well sheltered life if this kind of thing is new and surprising to you.
Whatever floats your boat.

Offline trevor

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Re: What have we(Filipinas) become....
« Reply #2 on: August 03, 2015, 11:25:05 AM »
Well in my opinion the guy is trying and most likely have good intention toward the filipina he hope to marry. But i think he is going about the meeting process in a wrong way. Needs time to get to know someone and even with time one never can tell what they will get.
If any woman is willing to jump in the sack with a man shortly after meeting him then i think that says a lot about her morality and men will quickly loose respect for women like that.
People need to practice safe sex but unfortunately many does not. I know many people who got taken advantage of. It goes both ways. Many filipina marry older guys then dump them later for younger ones. From what i saw that is a common thing in the States. The only remedy for that is time. At 70 yrs. old it does not seems like this guy have a lot of time to get to know the women he meets. This is a hard tread to reply to. Philippines is a poor third world country and many things is lacking. High unemployment rate, the average Filipino male cannot even afford to take care of a wife. Because most foreigner is in a better financial position many women will flock toward the foreigner, not out of love but just to have a better life and the many opportunities which this presents. Not saying this is true for all but some. I would say most of us foreigners have a loving and stable marriage with our filipina wives. People need to be smart and take care of their priorities. Cannot worry about the next person. At least that is what i do. Take care of my family and myself. Not  even sure if i answer this tread the right way.
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Offline iamjames

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Re: What have we(Filipinas) become....
« Reply #3 on: August 03, 2015, 01:11:38 PM »
Yes indeed it is a complicated one to answer Trevor. There are very many factors involved and the very worst is to start throwing the idea of Immorality at the Filipinas.
There is the desperation of fulfilling their duty to look after their parents and siblings as best as possible. This is a common factor in poverty stricken people. Duty, and responsibility, of necessity take priority over morality. I blame no Filipina for this.

The next 'blame' i suggest is contact with western culture and 'POP' idols who are seen as the ideal but display the lowest forms of immoral behaviour. It is not easy for the younger people to draw the distinction between correct western values and the values thrown at them by the uneducated gutter of pop culture.

I also see fault ion the 'novella' culture. One Filipina said to me recently "life is reflected in Novellas"!!!!! Filipinos are exposed to this garbage which shows generally insipid upperclass lifestyles where the only story seems to be who is in bed with whom! Women cry about every 5 minutes while men bully the women or stare blankly and moronically into space trying to look like they are in deep thought....

Last but not least is the foreign men who lure young women with the promise of a life of luxury and leisure. Lie, use, abuse, dump ... in that order. This is the real immorality. This is the sickness that must be challenged: Sick foreigners whose one objective is self gratification without and real lasting concern for the young desperate women. We have all met this type of tourist and maybe it is time we foreigners took a more active part in preventing this abuse.

Offline hitekcountry

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Re: What have we(Filipinas) become....
« Reply #4 on: August 03, 2015, 01:49:26 PM »
So He intends to line up 30-50 ladies as though they were cattle in an attempt to find his true love.

I might suggest that a lady of quality, one with self-respect, the one that a person would truly wish to find would never submit herself to that form of humiliation.

Only the most desperate will answer his call. Good luck with that.

Offline FMSINC

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Re: What have we(Filipinas) become....
« Reply #5 on: August 03, 2015, 04:01:35 PM »
Last but not least is the foreign men who lure young women with the promise of a life of luxury and leisure. Lie, use, abuse, dump ... in that order. This is the real immorality. 

I hate to tell you this but there are more married Filipino Men taking advantage of young girls here then the Foreigners.

Almost every girl in college here has a married lover paying for her schooling seems to be part of the culture going rate in our town is 20,000 month they even have brokers finding them lovers

Offline Art, just a re(tired) Fil-Am

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Re: What have we(Filipinas) become....
« Reply #6 on: August 03, 2015, 04:13:42 PM »
Well Julie,
Angeles City certainly isn't the place to look for a prospective g/f or a companion for a 70 yr old foreigner. The guy is just looking for trouble even though he had been previously married to a Filipina. He just assumes Filipinas are easy to get like a piece of meat at a butcher house and so he returns to the Philippines, because women in his home country probably wouldn't give him the time of day or even a second look!
I wouldn't have his type renting and using his rental as his own private brothel to exploit young women, though it's JMHO! I know it's none of our business what one does in the privacy of their own home or rental, but this fella makes it obvious for everyone to see! It shows me, that this fella has no morals and also the young women in his company even though it's always about money and or their next meal ticket! Really sad for those type of women, but it's their personal business and there's nothing anyone can do about it, unless they are being abused every which way!       
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Offline tartantbird

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Re: What have we(Filipinas) become....
« Reply #7 on: August 03, 2015, 07:36:45 PM »
Sad to read that a 70 year old US guy [could easily be a UK/European too]has to stoop so low- all he is doing is exploiting young vulnerable woman.

I look back to my times in Singapore and witnessed so many  "mature" western men with a young Asian girl on his arm- who on earth is he kidding, only himself. It made me cringe with embarrassment to see it. By all means have a companion but why not a mature woman closer to his age-they are just as beautiful - mostly though these guys were not that good looking at all and could only resort to "paying" his way as the mature woman had more sense probably

Offline jjcabgou

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Re: What have we(Filipinas) become....
« Reply #8 on: August 03, 2015, 09:43:51 PM »
I felt anguish on a recent issue and I thought I share.

Two months ago, a 70 year old retired American guy came to rent a unit in the property. He used to be married to a Filipina when he came to retire initially here a few years ago, brought her back to the US and later divorced him. That is his story and he sounded bitter and boy he is a talker. He came on a PRA visa and is actively looking for a partner/companion. Ok, don't point a finger at me, I am not interested nor he does lol. I tried not to get involved with his affairs as he likes to share what's going on on his daily life and so I made it a point to deal with my brother and his wife for any concern. So he did talked a lot to them as they help him clean his place and do his laundry.

A couple of weeks ago, he had been trolling the internet dating sites and chat sites. And suddenly, he had been sending money to western union to bring these women he met online to his place, according to my brother. One stayed for 1 day, 2 days etc. and I have to step in and talked  to him. He thinks, it is not my business, perhaps so, but I told him he is on a month to month lease and if I don't agree with what's going on in my property, I have the right to ask him to leave. He seem to get along with the last gal and enthusiastic about her, a 27 year old woman from Laguna. But...she has a child from being a rape victim.

Yesterday, the gal from laguna left and she said she is coming back and the American guy left today to Angeles City for a 2 weeks stay. Over dinner last night, my sister in law said, he is meeting 30-50 women in his hotel, by the pool, and screen them one by one. He got a checklist. I was shocked! Hence, this dilemma. What has become of us Filipinas. We have become so cheap and has lost morals. Of course, there's an exception. Was it due to so much poverty and a glimmer of hope to go abroad and have a better life? Blame the politicians for being insensitive to the plight of the people they ought to serve by being corrupt to the bone and not doing their job of creating jobs and curtailing the over population? What about the ethics of these foreign guys who come to the country and exploit our women. How many other foreign guys come to the country doing similar to what this guy is doing? Ok ok, I have heard women scammers as well to be fair. My other concern is the spread of HIV and AIDS in the country. Recent news indicate about 500 new cases of the deadly virus added to the statistics every month. More young people who have no idea of the virus and it's transmission are getting infected. Now go figure. The INCUBATION period of the virus is up to TEN YEARS and that means one can be infected without showing symptoms and spread the virus to others. Get tested? Please bear in mind that the WINDOW period after one is infected can take ....2 weeks - 6 months...for the body to start making HIV antibodies....and that means one can have NEGATIVE test, even tho infected and spread the disease.

I know there's a lot of decent, level headed expats/foreign guys out there who have found the love of their life and have made the country their permanent home or have brought their ladies back to their home country. Perhaps you can share your experiences/ideas for others to learn from, on how to meet women without playing Russian roulette, with more respect or without exploiting our vulnerable women. Thank you.
"Was it due to so much poverty and a glimmer of hope to go abroad and have a better life? Blame the politicians for being insensitive to the plight of the people they ought to serve by being corrupt to the bone and not doing their job of creating jobs and curtailing the over population? What about the ethics of these foreign guys who come to the country and exploit our women. How many other foreign guys come to the country doing similar to what this guy is doing?"
First question, yes absolutely.  Millions grow up in poverty we will never understand and are probably taught as soon as they can understand that their only ticket out of the s*** hole they are in, is to marry a foreigner and move away. For many, that is their only goal in life.  As far as the politicians yes again absolutely.  The exporting of all of the skilled/talented filipinos should have caught somebody's eye about 30 years ago.  The proper course of action at that time would have been to enact policies etc. to try and keep the best and brightest in the homeland.  Now OFW's are a money cow to the corrupt.  That goes back to problem 1 above, millions growing up without one or both parents because they are overseas (not the best family life for a child).  Now the loser foreigners that come here.  Most, if not all, the foreigners that post in this forum seem to have their head on straight and are not the "typical" loser foreigner that comes here.  A big percentage of the guys that come here, IMHO, are fn losers (probably not a majority, but a whole lot of them).  They are drawn here by the girls that would actually show up to interview to date a foreigner that she has never even met.  One of the really sad things is many of these girls do not realize they are getting mixed up with guys that were nitwits in their home country.... UGH. 
and yes I am generalizing and yes I know it works both ways, and many of the "scammers" actually end up with "losers", so in those cases they deserve each other. 
Somebody else mentioned there are many more filipino men that take advantage and or abuse filipina women, I am assuming they were taking the ratio of foreign men to Pinoys into consideration when they made that statement.  I don't know if I agree with that BUT, one of the cries of pinays that I have heard over the last 27 years is they do not want a pinoy because of infidelity etc....  so many vicious cycles in this country reminds my of my old spirograph toy.


Offline JoeLP

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Re: What have we(Filipinas) become....
« Reply #9 on: August 03, 2015, 10:00:43 PM »
So He intends to line up 30-50 ladies as though they were cattle in an attempt to find his true love.

I might suggest that a lady of quality, one with self-respect, the one that a person would truly wish to find would never submit herself to that form of humiliation.

Only the most desperate will answer his call. Good luck with that.

I agree completely.

That said, this is nothing new.  There are websites that teach men how to go to the Phils for a month and have a girl for each night to enjoy the bedroom life with.  Some just explain how to spend a month with at least a girl in your bed, not always a different girl, but ways to meet them online, get the set up for your arrival and stays and all that.

These girls, for the most part, are not the "for the rest of your life" type material.  Either they lack quality, or they are too desperate and when that desperation leaves, there's a good chance they are not the type the man was looking for. 

Lei, this is nothing new.  If you have issues with this, get rid of him.  But don't go thinking he's going to be changing. 
In the land of the blind, the one eyed man is king.

Offline wildbill

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Re: What have we(Filipinas) become....
« Reply #10 on: August 04, 2015, 12:43:22 AM »
WOW!...To each his own but I have my Morals in check I hope.....Fall in love at our age lol.......I agree with most of what is said here but as for meeting a young pinay and Bringing her to the usa Hell no..I have already raised my kids and I dont intend to start a new Family....Morals must play a Big part in my Life I guess it has alot to do with the way your brought up? I dont Date many Just one at a time....But o-well I already passed that stage.....ok...some of you might have a very young pinay but thats not my way..and I wont knock on your door for being or doing it your way but in my opion if I see you with a young hot fancy pretty young to young girl I will say to my wife your a DOM.sorry if you dont like that....I just dont respect pinays but all women of all races...sounds like this man was dooped and now wants to get slaped once again.Lei in my opion I would make him leave That just sounds nasty to me sorry...Gross and what do the people around think of you renting to him??PS I dont want anyone to type me any nasty comments because this is my opinion and its like they say we all have one...

Offline BudM

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Re: What have we(Filipinas) become....
« Reply #11 on: August 04, 2015, 09:38:18 AM »
Well, you must think most are DOM then because Filipina are very difficult to tell how old they are especially when you are not that up close and since they generally age beautifully and gracefully. You don't know usually.  You are probably out there with your wife and other expats are thinking DOM about you too.


Lei, the consensus is apparently to throw that guy's butt out if that is what you are trying to decide.
Whatever floats your boat.

Offline wildbill

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Re: What have we(Filipinas) become....
« Reply #12 on: August 04, 2015, 10:14:40 AM »
Well, you must think most are DOM then because Filipina are very difficult to tell how old they are especially when you are not that up close and since they generally age beautifully and gracefully. You don't know usually.  You are probably out there with your wife and other expats are thinking DOM about you too.

  well you must be assuming way to much for sure my wife is only 8 years younger than me.....budm please understand what I said 65 with a 20 years old little girl walking around with kids in tow...commom I have grown ass kids already..if you wish to start over good luck to who ever likes it....budm you very well know we would not do this in the usa so why just because they are poor and looking for a ATM why would some one 65 or older do that?DOM.....if you dont like it just report my comments ...Lei yes its up to you if you let him stay...I know for sure someone in here may be affended by what I said...this is only my opinion and I am sticking to it!..I did not say if I meet you and your wife or girl-friend was to young that I would say or do anything bad to anyone..its just my opinion..Good Luck to those of have a very young lady in hands its up to you I wish you all the Luck in the world....Happy Trails..


I repaired the quote. Lee2
« Last Edit: August 04, 2015, 10:43:15 AM by Lee2 »

Offline piozam13

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Re: What have we(Filipinas) become....
« Reply #13 on: August 04, 2015, 10:21:41 AM »
He is 70.  Obviously he would like to find the right one this time.  Whether he is looking for a wife, a  caretaker or simply a companion, he wants someone he can get along well.   If you've got resources, you've got a choice.  If he chooses well, he can be happy for the rest of his life.  Why not?
For the girls or women maybe it is an opportunity to get out of poverty?,  a better life?, love?  Many would do anything.   
However, it is your property and business.  Call the shots!


Offline Lee2

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Re: What have we(Filipinas) become....
« Reply #14 on: August 04, 2015, 10:55:21 AM »
Age difference is always a problem on forums, PLEASE lets drop the judgemental posting, to each his own. I have met quite a few with many years between them and they seemed very happy, so love has a strange way of hitting some of us without us expecting it to.

For the record my wife is 20 years younger than I am, I met her at 23 and we married when she was 26 and while I thought she was too young for me, we get along great and have already been married 21 years, so age is not always an issue.

:) Happily married since 1994 & live part of the year in Cebu and the rest in S. Florida.

 


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