Author Topic: Mindanao - Safety Question  (Read 12133 times)

Offline tuckman4

  • Full Member
  • **
  • Posts: 7
Re: Mindanao - Safety Question
« Reply #15 on: May 01, 2010, 07:21:02 AM »
The plan is for her to go to the hotel and leave her bags with the desk and then take the shuttle to the airport in davao to meet me. I hired a private car thru the hotel to take us both back to check in. I will invite her parents ( only) to come into davao to the hotel to meet me for lunch...by the way someone wrote when i meet her parents dont forget the \" paslubong \" what is that? My real concern is wether or not its feasible for the exboyfriend to try and do me harm or would it be far fetched. I have been talking with a really nice guy named Bob Martin who has been very helpful and he feels that I will be safe...he feels it was very stupid of her to tell him but doubts anything will happen to me that as long as i stay in davao city I am safe.....I dont want to be a chicken, but dont want to get killed either....I really dont want to change hotels as the Marco Polo looks like the nicest in davao city. The question is how easy would it be for this guy from catabato to do me harm....by the way she claims her ex comes from a good family and is not a violent person ( for whatever thats worth). if it were me I would be upset, but would never hurt anyone...but who knows maybe he could tell the kiddnappers i am rich ( which I am not) and they could grab me? all sorts of things are going thru my mind...If I was going to CA or NY in the states i would not care....but the Phils scare me.

Offline tom.inbigdtexas

  • Sr Member +
  • Sr Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 789
Re: Mindanao - Safety Question
« Reply #16 on: May 01, 2010, 07:57:18 AM »
all sorts of things are going thru my mind...If I was going to CA or NY in the states i would not care....but the Phils scare me.

 :D --- The Phils scared me too ---  ;D --- but it turned out to be my preconceptions, vivid imagination and paranoia.  By the time my first visit with the family was over, I felt both silly and a little bit ashamed of myself.  If you\'re interested, I\'ve posted this story and some photos at:

http://livinginthephilippines.com/forum/index.php/topic,2632.msg23921.html#msg23921

Now I would be scared if I was meeting her family in CA or NY.  :)

Tom in Big D
Dallas, Tx, USA
Mactan, Cebu, PH

Offline RUFUS

  • Administrator
  • Sr Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 2,200
Re: Mindanao - Safety Question
« Reply #17 on: May 01, 2010, 08:47:10 AM »
pasalubong is a gift.
It would be nice if you bring them some small trinkets from the USA.
T-shirts or hats with sports or college team names printed on them.
Small bottles of perfume or cologne.
Pints of US alcohol
Chocolates and candies for kids.
ETC...
SO SAYETH THE RUFUS

Offline tuckman4

  • Full Member
  • **
  • Posts: 7
Re: Mindanao - Safety Question
« Reply #18 on: May 01, 2010, 10:43:38 AM »
Tom thanks for the Pictures and the story...it was really nice to read......I was thinking instead of bringing trinkets and small gifts i would just give the parents 10,000 PHP as a gift. figuring that they would need and appreciate that more.....or is that an insult. I planned on buying a bunch of chocolate to give them to take home to all the kids. Thanks so much for all your replies

Offline coutts00

  • Sr Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1,470
Re: Mindanao - Safety Question
« Reply #19 on: May 01, 2010, 12:34:32 PM »
Gifts and not expensive ones. Lets not set a precedent now, you are not rich, and lets let them keep that preconception. As soon as you start flashing cash, you will have every neighbour asking for it. 10k is 2 months salary.
Wayne  ;D ;D

Offline c_a_p_t_a_i_n_r_o_n

  • Sr Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1,794
Re: Mindanao - Safety Question
« Reply #20 on: May 01, 2010, 01:43:29 PM »
On my second (or third trip) to see Gloria I wanted time alone with her, at times I was overwhelmed by all the \"little\" trips she\'d planned for me.
She\'d tell me we would go see 1 person......but had 2 or 3 side trips that I didn\'t know about initially .......wore me out some days

...... so I booked a trip on SuperFerry from Manila to Cebu on my arrival .......no relatives, no unscheduled visits......it was only a day and a half but good to have time away from relatives.........

You could do something similar at some point in your trip Davao to Cebu.....maybe at midpoint so you get a break

Offline dylanaz

  • Sr Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2,135
Re: Mindanao - Safety Question
« Reply #21 on: May 01, 2010, 02:48:39 PM »
...but who knows maybe he could tell the kiddnappers i am rich ( which I am not) ...

By saying that - ALL THE MORE REASON to listen to the others and NEVER give P10k ...

A \"pasalubong\" is basically expected EVERYTIME you visit !
They will - by nature - expect P10k PER VISIT if you do that !

Relatives who visit me bring fruit from their trees (or neighbors trees) or bread... and as we saw in my recent post... one gave me the hat off his own head !

Its just like a small token and its ROUTINE - its not like Christmas !

Its more like getting a free newspaper when you buy a breakfast !

You give P10k... they tell their friends and family.. and yes.. LINES WILL START FORMING....

Not saying to be cheap.. just \"When in rome...\"

How about asking - and not give her a hint.. ask your girl.. what \"pasalubong\" she thinks will be nice for her parents.. put it on her... chances are you will end up with cupcakes or the likes...

NOTE: A govt employee in RP asked me to bring him back a pasalubong... his request... a Piggy Bank from MExico (since he knew Arizona borders Mexico) thats it ... a $1 piggy bank for a lifetimer in a govt office job !
I have seen so much conflict while in the Philippines - amazingly 99% of it was merely online computer experiences :D

Offline RUFUS

  • Administrator
  • Sr Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 2,200
Re: Mindanao - Safety Question
« Reply #22 on: May 02, 2010, 01:01:39 AM »
ANYTHING that has something printed on it from stateside goes over great.
I gave out T-shirts that I bought at a Champion outlet bargain bin, printed with different sports and college names and cost me about $3/ea. You woulda thought I handed each person a gold nugget...
I also get those huge bags of Tootsie rolls at the dollar store, the kids just gobble those up..
SO SAYETH THE RUFUS

Offline Gray Wolf

  • Sr Member +
  • Sr Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 5,134
Re: Mindanao - Safety Question
« Reply #23 on: May 02, 2010, 04:13:22 AM »
When it comes to pasalubong, it truly is the thought that counts, not the cost of the gift.  Trust everyone when we say do not bring a gift valued at 10Kpesos.  In some families that could almost be considered an insult, since they could never afford anything even remotely close to that.  It also sets a very precarious precedent for you as every subsequent visit they will all be waiting for their expensive gifts.

One more story to put the value of that gift in perspective.  When I first met Gloria, my wife, she was working at a very large plastics manufacturing corporation as the executive assistant to the President of the corporation.  She was very highly paid for her work.  She made so much money, she gave half of her pay to help support her parents and nieces/nephews.  She earned 10kpesos per month, the same amount as the gift you planned to give the parents of your gf.  Waaay too much for a first time visit and even for later on after you\'re married, in most cases.

T-shirts printed with US sports teams, city names, state names, etc are a huge hit with everyone.  We bought 50 t-shirts at 3/$5 in a local flea market and gave one to every niece, nephew, sis, bro, aunt, uncle, mom and dad.  They were more proud of those t-shirts than anything!  Next trip I brought along 24 cheap ball caps (old samples that had been laying around my office collecting dust)   They almost fought over those $1 caps!   :D

Don\'t over do it with your first trip.  If you marry the girl, you\'ll have plenty of opportunities to \"show off\" later.    ;)   :)  :)  :)   
Louisville, KY USA

Offline tuckman4

  • Full Member
  • **
  • Posts: 7
Re: Mindanao - Safety Question
« Reply #24 on: May 02, 2010, 12:12:40 PM »
Thanks for all your input. I will go buy a bunch of t shirts at the flea market and give those out. I know the kids love chocolate. Is there a place in davao where i can buy alot of Chocolate cheap so i dont have to travel with it?

Thanks

Gary

Offline c_a_p_t_a_i_n_r_o_n

  • Sr Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1,794
Re: Mindanao - Safety Question
« Reply #25 on: May 02, 2010, 01:57:48 PM »
If you are flying into Manila first, after arriving there are stores selling candies, chocolates in the airport itself before you go thru customs......

Offline RUFUS

  • Administrator
  • Sr Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 2,200
Re: Mindanao - Safety Question
« Reply #26 on: May 02, 2010, 02:30:48 PM »
FYI...
As per Mrs RUFUS, the chocolates made in the Philippines do not taste the same as the ones sold in the US. Even though the same brand, the taste is different. WHY, I do not know. But who is to argue with pinoy logic ??? ??? ???
SO SAYETH THE RUFUS

Offline GregW

  • Sr Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1,188
Re: Mindanao - Safety Question
« Reply #27 on: May 03, 2010, 02:43:58 AM »
Ah, but Rufus, have you ever tried Cloud Nine in the RP?  Sure it doesn\'t have the class of being known as \"imported\" but it\'s pretty darn good.



Ako si Goyo.   Amerikano akong lawas pero Bisaya akong kasing-kasing

Offline RUFUS

  • Administrator
  • Sr Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 2,200
Re: Mindanao - Safety Question
« Reply #28 on: May 03, 2010, 03:32:13 AM »
Nope, haven\'t tried it.
I\'m not much of a chocolate eater tho...
I\'ll give it a taste on the next trip.
SO SAYETH THE RUFUS

Offline jonnyivy

  • Sr Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 503
Re: Mindanao - Safety Question
« Reply #29 on: May 03, 2010, 04:01:39 AM »
\"cloud nine\" ,.. hehe,.. now that brings back memories !
We always hold small games outside the house for the young kids when we visit. Most \"prizes\" are single sweets from the multi-packs we buy in the city before we go down to the province. We have to think of extra special games for the \"prize\" of a cloud nine, like jumping higher and higher over a bar, or limbo-ing under it. Should see me trying to beat them, just to get the prize for myself !!
Delicious !!(and great fun )

Jonny
A True Friend Is Someone Who Sees the Pain in Your Eyes While Everyone Else Believes the Smile on Your Face

 


bisaya, cebuano, cebuano lessons, bisaya lessons
Romantic Tagalog