Hey WB, you can do all that with your passport at the Embassy as people have been saying but before you actually do, check their website for all the current procedures at the time you do. Also, check to make sure they are processing them at that time. Right now, to my knowledge as of a few days ago, there was a computer glitch with the passport processing system and for any US Embassy overseas, there is a hold temporary hold on processing until sometime after they get it straightened out.
Don't feel bad about what you said. I love my country too but too many people are trying to bring it down both knowingly and unknowingly and also when I too get around too many Americans talking, my head begins to hurt really bad.